May 8, 2009
Top Ten Real Facts about Swine Flu
From our desks overlooking the parking lot, here they are:
10) Swine – It’s not about pigs (everybody knows the scientific reference to a “quadruple reassortant” virus); it’s about people (although some people are pigs) hygiene and cooties
Swine Flu Song – The best video clips are right here
9) VP Joe Biden – He’s not a doctor or medical expert; he just plays one on morning talk shows.
8) Food – Eating Mexican food is not the same as going to Mexico. There’s no such thing as a fajita fatality.
7) Pandemic – Not synonymous with or the same word as “epidemic” or “panic”. Details, details.
6) Helpful Link – To cut through the ambiguous medical jargon and political hyperbole, just visit Do I Have Swine Flu?
5) H1N1 – Just rolls right off the tongue, doesn’t it? Also makes you look uber smart when used in conversation.
4) The CDC – The key word is CONTROL. They should try to get some over public information.
3) The WHO – Popular rock band begun in the late 60s best known for such hits as “My Generation” and “I Can See for Miles”.
2) To Close or Not to Close? – Do we close schools or not? Just how much havoc/panic/hysteria/disruption can be created in the lives of millions? Like breastfeeding or Brett Favre , the decision depends on the day.
And the top real fact about swine flu:
1) Sweeps – We’re in the middle of TV ratings for goodness sakes. On the upside, both the flu and sweeps end soon.
The time was ripe for lampooning this overdone topic. Not to make light of those impacted by this virus, why can’t the media get that worked up over something more dangerous to everyone – like heart disease, drinking and driving, child abuse, etc.? Apparently these issues, which are far more prevalent than H1N1, don’t warrant the ratings.